Sometimes what\u2019s on the inside can be really hard to see, and you only understand the fullness of what\u2019s going on once things go horribly wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As I was in the thick of recovery last week, there was obvious strain on my body. It\u2019s pretty east to ignore these things generally. There are also many viruses floating around, so I was trying to stay healthy on top of the that. The last straw was staying up a little too late a couple nights in a row. I knew I should probably be sleeping, but I ignored that thought, thinking I would be fine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Lo and behold, come Saturday, my body rebelled. I ended up with multiple cold sores, which, if you know what those are, are not the most fun experience. (I don\u2019t know why exactly they exist, but they are sort of a viral lip sore and once you get them, they remain dormant in your nerves or something [I\u2019m trusting google on this one] and you can keep getting them.) Well, I know that if I\u2019m stressed, tired or sick, the chances of me coming down with one of these is much higher. I take vitamins that help prevent them, but I also had been slacking on my vitamins…<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Overall, the cause wasn\u2019t just one thing, it was a combination of a bunch of poor decisions and the general healing process. But I couldn\u2019t see that anything was wrong until all the sudden – BLAM! There\u2019s evidence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I think our hearts are like this too. We can ignore symptoms or play with things we know are going to burn later, but often we can\u2019t or won\u2019t see the results of this until there is an explosive outburst of something.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Our emotions are kind of like the symptoms of the heart. When you get sick, you can feel it coming on, can maybe tell that, oh, that late night made me feel worse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When you are deep down feeling betrayed or grieved or angry, it will come out sooner or later. If we aren\u2019t watching for the signs that something is wrong, it will probably come out at a terribly inopportune time. One small thing – a late night, so to speak – might push you over the edge, and you\u2019ll be left wondering where all those emotions came from, and why on earth did they come out now?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n I don\u2019t know how to fix these things. But I\u2019ve been observing recently that often, the first step to fixing something is identifying something is wrong. I, for one, have spent years<\/em> gaslighting myself into thinking nothing is wrong, only to be proven very wrong later. But once you can see an issue, it makes it easier to know how to fix it. I feel like there\u2019s a car analogy in there somewhere, but seeing as I\u2019m not a mechanic, I\u2019ll leave that for you to think about.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Sometimes what\u2019s on the inside can be really hard to see, and you only understand the fullness of what\u2019s going on once things go horribly wrong…<\/p>\n